Fire and Water

Jessica Dofflemyer ~ all rights reserved

plum tea
freshly brewed coffee
and the last of the Beltane honey

swirling in the morning
I try holding
elusive steam
in sunlight

3 Comments

    1. Thanks for the feedback. Now that you mention that, I can see what you mean. There was an essential part of the moment when the photo was taken that was directly related to my attempt at capturing the elusive. Did that need to be expressed in words, or was it inferred with the photo? Or did those few words of the first stanza express it all? Great food for thought. Mahalo for taking the time!

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    2. I think using the last of the honey gets hold of just enough of it that the photo does the rest. You’re entering the realm of haiga that way (and no, I wouldn’t tamper with the syllable-count unless you get a burst of inspiration to do that).

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