October 16, 2010

photo by Jessica Dofflemyer

 

drop off Jeb at the mermaid’s house
tucked in the princess flowers
nestled from the bay
at the foot of the mountains
he’s left with the naturopathic doctor
to play truth or dare by the bon fire
have a night time swim in the sea

me, I go alone
under the stars
to the small group gathered
with the Iranian healer
born in Canada
he lives in Costa Rica
and is here at the farm of flying flowers

I come with an open heart
hope to loosen the tight in my chest
he calls me forward
wraps his arms around me
and meets me heart to heart

I feel the love
touch my own blocked walls
gently fall backwards into trusted arms
and am laid upon my blanket

breath, grief, gratitude, tears
crickets sing in unison in October grass
my written words
communication
the reason that I walk this earth
a sharing
the Magdalene
my growing son
a promise
to an open heart

it is all a mystery
an experience that can’t be named
mind tries
like here and now
to tell of the touching
my truest essence
that familiar thread
of home

October 15, 2010

While this morning’s coffee percolates, I come to the butcher block to write last night’s dreams on the page. Here in the scattered gecko poop, dusty gemstones and papery peels of old garlic cloves the details filter through my pen.

Two young girls are hospitalized while in my care due to dehydration. I tossed myself awake and thought “must remember tomorrow to tell coach at soccer camp to make sure Jeb is getting enough water!”

Then back to sleep where I found myself in a new town with a lover from my past. There’s a restaurant down the street and I’m excited to go with him. I’m inspired to get dressed up: nice shoes, stockings and a skirt. I keep trying to find the right clothes to wear. One green crocheted shirt in my bag with sparkled beads reveals a salsa stain in the lower corner. Can’t seem to get the stockings to fit just right.

Lover from the past is hedging while I sift through my suitcase. He’s feeling too much between us, not sure we should even dine together. He considers saying goodbye and leaving me there in a pile of ill-fitting, mismatched garments.

Coffee’s ready now and the dreams are in the archive. I observe my dull headache and wonder if I’m the one that’s dehydrated.

 

water is life - photo by Jessica Dofflemyer

 

 

October 14, 2010

Because I was feeling sick, Jeb and I got cozy and settled in for some movie time together with The Endless Summer.

One of my favorite parts was when they were in South Africa and saw some sand dunes that they knew would eventually lead them to the ocean.  Should they cross the sands?  How long would it take?  Would it even be worth the journey?  They had no idea what kind of waves (if any) they’d find.

And what they did find was Cape St. Francis with what they describe as the “perfect wave”.  Clean, long curls over sandy bottom that rolled on and on so long their legs cramped as they squatted in the tube.

We all have our own kind of perfect wave.  Some dream we hold in our hearts of the ultimate experience.  And we all have our trek to get there.

Here’s to everyone getting their dream ride.