The Beauty of Foreign Territory

It doesn’t seem fair. This one-way street.

How all communications, negotiations, explanations have to be in English. Throwing in curveball words like “knee” that don’t even pronounce the ‘k’.

And I never realized the possessiveness of this language. All the “my”‘s. The Bohemian may want to say that he is sleeping on his back. So he will tell me, “I’m sleeping on the back.”

I like the way this sounds, just slightly different. But he wants me to tell him when I hear these subtleties.

“Just so you know, it really would be more like, ‘I’m sleeping on my back.'”

“Oh, okay. Not the back. My back.”

We laugh and chime…”mine, mine, mine.”

Inspired to incorporate a more sharing spirit in our communications, I suggest that we have periods of time when the Bohemian just speaks Czech. Hold nothing back, no need to translate, just let it flow in his native tongue. I reason that should I be in the Czech Republic this would be my fate. Immersed in a culture of humans speaking a language I did not understand, searching faces and hand gestures for cues.

Maybe this exercise would help me feel what he is speaking, instead of understanding it.

Late one night we try it. He begins slowly, those first, foreign, beautiful words moving through air to my ears. From that initial syllable, I know not a word he is saying.

from ALPHABET by Karel Teige

I am like a person blindfolded in a room, new senses surfacing in an attempt to orient themselves to a world without sight.

My mind tries to order this barrage of sentences into familiar boxes – make sense of this transmission. But it is all so different, so unknown. My brain surrenders. Lets go. I stop thinking and I am left to soak in the essence of a lyrical delivery that reveals the natural, deeply rooted heritage of the speaker. This Bohemian man I love.

I watch intently as his face softens, his eyes dancing in sync with the words that roll from his mouth like a song. I swear he is sparkling in a way I have never seen before.

This is an effortless communication that flows from him with ease. A purely one-way street, he can say anything here and I will never really know. Just get it out and speak it, and I’ll just be there smiling, taking in exotic sounds.

As he continues, holding my hand, our faces close, I catch only a two words I recognize. A few times the word “krásný” – “beautiful” – flows out between unknowns. And then, as he concludes, the final note to his song is “žena.”

I’ve heard this one before. And right now, I don’t want to translate it. Don’t want to know the context.

I just want to enjoy the sound of old letters making new sounds. Hum with the vibrations that move through his throat, rolling over me in a wash of fresh eloquence.

Not try to understand.

 

When in Doubt, Go Celestial

courtesy of NASA Goddard Photo & Video

 

I am
but oh, so small
upgraded neanderthal
with thumbs
spacing
letters on a screen

I’ve got a collection of pens
Radiohead CD
plants in pots
and a grocery list
at a desk
in a house

some dreams
inside my chest
oxygenated particles
giving me breath

as I try to sort
the silverware drawer
cosmic dust
and exploding gases
orchestrate
organized chaos
in deep space

if I only knew
the intelligent glue
that holds this all together

I’d surrender to gravity
admit
that I know nothing
be grateful for a day
to float in vastness
step among grass and shadows
feel the shine of a star
90 million miles away
not yet quite
an ember

Fight (gently) for Your Right

“You gotta fight for your right to party.”

My girlfriend paraphrases a classic 80’s Beastie Boys song. She’s not talking about boozing it up, though. What she means is that we all only have one life. This day. This hour. And the only one deciding how we live it, is us.

As technology ramps, making us available to each other every nanosecond, it seems expectations increase. Our time, these moments of living that make up a space in which we call our lives, is pulled in multiple directions. Each direction calls, as we attempt to navigate our way through the chaos.

So what am I trying to articulate here in this mass of unorganized words?

I am a fool that longs for balance!

All the while, reality appears to laugh at my desire to have things flow in some perfected sense of equilibrium and harmony. To think! There’s some place where I could sit and sigh, throw my feet up and sip a lemonade? Say that I’ve finally arrived at perfection? Ahhh! Sweet balance. Hah!

As I juggle schedules, a dinner that includes protein and greens, 2nd grade math, and some semblance of romance with my sweetheart over laundry (oh yeah, and maybe floss my teeth), I realize this idea of perfected balance is quite possibly an illusion. Some fallacy of the mind that there is a final destination to be achieved, when in fact, it’s all about the experience along the way. That big, messy, sometimes-out-of-control journey called Life.

So when my friend quotes the Beastie Boys, what I think she’s saying is that there are a million distractions on this outrageous odyssey. An infinite amount of possible paths that will gladly pull you along towards their agendas. It takes a little clarity, a little vision. You may have to wield the sword to carve out the life you want to live. This path may be a little uncharted but it’s worth the challenge to live the life you love.

photo courtesy of James Cridland

As I welcome so many beautiful changes into my life these days, I know the old routine I had grown accustomed to is shifting.

And I’ll be candid and tell you now (but if you’re one of the beautiful ones following this blog – you may have already noticed): I’ve been sleeping in for the last two weeks, barely able to post to my beloved Archives during my typical 4:30am writing hour.

Here’s where, I guess, I need to bring out the sword. Acquiesce and set an alarm, even though I have an aversion to alarm clocks. I’m seeking balance here. Fighting (with gentle, balanced intention) for my right to party.