Posted on by Jessica Dofflemyer

The Outing

photo by Jessica Dofflemyer

 

You’ve exercised
communed in nature
done your writing drafts
posted to your blog
you’re in the haven of space you’ve been craving
your six-year old is gone for the night
its time to exit the house this evening
but all your girlfriends are married
the men you know are out of range

you dress to go to the post office
where your box is empty
you can’t go home just yet
last stop, the dreaded bakery
where you know all resources have been exhausted
and you are in a very sorry state

another soul much in the same duress is there
that intense poet with the long hair
and undying crush on you
he is enthused you are without child tonight
asks you if you’d care to join him for a drink next door
having nothing but an empty home awaiting you
you acquiesce
and toast
Patron margaritas, salt, on the rocks Read more

Posted on by Jessica Dofflemyer

Memories of Yaz at Payless Shoe Source

photo by Jessica Dofflemyer

 

I’m in Payless Shoe Source with my 6 year old trying on his first pair of tie shoes.
He doesn’t know how to tie bows yet but I’m hoping these new Converse-style kicks will inspire him.

Jeb pulls the tongue of the shoe out and wrestles with the laces while Erasure’s “Chains of Love” bleeds out over the shoe store sound system.

“…come to me, cover me, hold me, together we’ll break these chains of love…”

The synthesized sounds take me back to 1986, when I was 15, wearing Keds and listening to Yaz. That summer my friend and I met Marcus, the older boy with the long ponytail who chewed Big Red and drove us around in his Audi listening to “Upstairs at Eric’s” at high volume.

Back at Payless Shoes I tie Jeb’s bright white laces and put a thumb to the toe to check for space.

“How do they feel? Do they feel like they fit?”

He nods and smiles.

“…they used to talk about the weather, making plans together, days would last forever…”

I’m 36 now, on my knees in the size 1 aisle listening to Vince Clarke’s keyboards in a whole new context.

“…don’t give up, don’t give up now, together with me and my baby break the chains of love…”

We buy the shoes.

And when we get home – I can’t believe it – Jeb ties them on his first try.

Posted on by Jessica Dofflemyer

The Corkscrew

I bought a bottle of French wine yesterday for no particular occasion. It only cost $15 but the gesture felt full and (pardon the word) “juicy” in a joie de vivre kind of way.

Bottle in hand, I returned home to an empty house and had exactly one hour before picking up my six year old. I thought to pour myself a glass of wine, let the setting sun cast golden on my velvet couch and do some writing. I’d let the rich, red liquid from a distant land loosen the words from my pencil lead. Maybe my fingers would fly over the keyboard. I would steep in the essence of being a 37 year old woman, alone in the early evening, drinking a glass of wine and writing, feeling sensual and alive. Read more