Rock Paper Scissors

Kámen, nůžky, papír!”

Jeb, the Bohemian and I are throwing our hands in the circle. Fists, flattened hands and peace signs.

This is Roshambo. Also known as Rock, Paper, Scissors and apparently this ancient game is universal.

courtesy of wikipedia

Jeb’s absorbent eight-year old mind has grasped these foreign words with ease and he not only exclaims them with solid vigor, he remembers them all day long.

Me, on the other hand, I’m in alien territory and my thirty-eight year old brain is dull.

In the evening at the dinner table, roshambo comes up again in our conversation.

“Ok, so it’s kámen…something…and then papír, right?” I ask.

Jeb laughs. “Nůžky!”

The Bohemian smiles.

“Right. Kámen, nůžky, papír. Ok, I got it.”

But I don’t’ feel like I’ve got it. This foreign language thing is slow going.

I wish I spoke five languages. The Bohemian speaks English, Polish, some Russian and I think he’d do alright in Germany.

Me, I grew up in California, exposed my whole life to Spanish. I studied it for years in school and I fantasize that if I lived in a Spanish-speaking country, I’d become fluent enough to start dreaming in that language. Though for now, I stumble clumsily through the most simple of Spanish conversation.

And then there’s Czech. Now that is truly foreign. These beautiful sounds that emerge from the mouth of the Bohemian have letter combinations I’ve never heard before. I am in a strange and unknown linguistic land where the exotic sounds wash over me in rolling ‘r’s’ and lilting ‘ch’s’ (although I think ‘ch’ is actually a letter in the alphabet that sounds sort of English ‘h’-ish and the English ‘ch’ sound is actually denoted in Czech by a ‘c’ with some cool diacritical mark. Whew. Anyway…). Just listening, I’m swirled in a spin where I cannot grasp the letters and hold them.

Give me a Czech word and half the time I cannot repeat it back correctly. There are subtle sounds, new combinations. Altogether different letters in the alphabet. ‘R’s I can’t roll. ‘H’s made from deep in the throat.

I fumble like a typical American. The Bohemian is patient, like his typical self.

My head is thick. My mind conditioned. I’m not used to something so radically different. I am realizing that some things need to be very close and in my face to really grasp, especially the unfamiliar.

WHOOOOHOOOO!

Ok. Staying ever-present in the Now and ever-dedicated to offering you the real and true Daily Chronicles, I will report the moments as they occur.

No sooner did I punctuate that last sentence (“…especially the unfamiliar”), ready to describe to you the moments when I shine most truly in foreign terrain, than  Jeb emerges from his bedroom – 5:20am – reporting that he is ill.

My Mother hat is donned instantly in a flurry of thermometers, juice, cold wash cloths and lavender oil. He does have a fever. Emails are sent to Dad and today’s work clients. No school. And Jeb’s birthday celebration scheduled for tomorrow is now in question.

It is currently 6:08am. Still dark. Jeb rests. I reach to complete a posting for the Archives while still staying attentive by his side.

Where was I going with all this?

courtesy of wikipedia

Rock, paper scissors.
The universal game of random chance that transcends all language.
My exploration into new territory.
Attempts to learn the subtleties.
Practicing grace among detours.

A reminder to have fun with the game.

Relaxed Grip

Feeling currents swooping about me in swift and rapid swirls, I seek that center point of balance where I can rest in solid calm.

It’s a lifelong dance I haven’t mastered.

But I keep trying. These days you’ll find me gripping the wheel as I drive the two-lane highway, listening to Eckhart Tolle in my Toyota. The passenger seat may be filled with a laptop computer, a stack of someone else’s mail, a jar full of water with a squeeze of lemon, and a bag of some kind of portable lunch snack (granola bar, carrot sticks, maybe Jeb’s junky Chex mix if I’m desperate).

The dash needs to be dusted. Shells are scattered in the cup holders. Meher Baba‘s image is propped to look at me in his youthful beardedness with the quote “Search for God within, the only treasure worth finding.”

courtesy of http://www.sedonacreativelife.com

Text messages may be coming in through my iPhone. Voicemail messages stacked. I’ll be slowing down where they’re doing the road work to make a new turn lane, easing through the aim of radar guns.

Who knows what I’m mulling over as I drive. My reckless, active mind on auto-pilot. Thinking thoughts a-plenty, while all the while the Albatrosses soar. The whales are making their way through the Pacific back to our shores. The mango tree in my yard is blooming.

Where am I as Eckhart’s voice, clear and calm with that indistinguishable foreign accent, is reminding me through car speakers that time is an illusion? That all that ever exists is now. Right now. Here. In the exquisite, unfathomable existence of being.

He says our minds resist. Persist. They’re locked in a timeline that does not exist. We are everywhere but here.

Eckhart Tolle

My heart knows this is true while my bull-headed mind quips, “Oh, yes, give me Now! But don’t forget to add first grade spelling tests and that after-school dental appointment.”

That’s me trying to be witty as I dance toward the balance, skipping steps and squashing toes as I go.

Playing with timelines (only momentarily, Eckhart) I look back at these Archives to this same time last year. (Was I still here in WordPress-land 365 days ago, asking questions and typing out my heart?)

The thread still seems the same. Then. Now. I’m practicing. Trying my best to flow with the current of life. Then, “Best Laid Plans” was dealing with a broken down washing machine but finding Venus and the moon through the detour of my plan.

Now, “Mystery Tour on the Road Less Traveled” draws on the curiosity of the future.

In one year, so much has changed, and yet, these basic truths remain. I’m still right here, right now. Sifting in the amorphous sphere of movement. Breathing somewhere between past and future. Susceptible to gentle or explosive changes in a plan.

It’s here I seek some loose parameters. Try to keep Jeb’s teeth clean. Make sure I eat my vegetables. Return phone calls within a day or two. Don’t text while driving. Hold the steering wheel but keep my grip relaxed.

Let Eckhart remind me of the power of the Now.

courtesy of http://www.thebirdguide.com

Happy Thanksliving

This Thanksgiving, Kauai’s Fringe-dweller’s buzz is a new twist to the holiday name. Forget the pilgrims and natives story, of course. Black Friday is being boycotted. And don’t bother greeting each other with the traditional “Happy Thanksgiving.”

No, (or, rather, in the life-affirming ‘yes’) Thanksgiving is being transformed. We can now share with each other a new and neutral celebratory reminder.

We have evolved to “Happy Thanksliving”.

So, in keeping with living in thanks, Jeb, the Bohemian and I moved out of the kitchen (grateful, of course, for the homemade chocolate and avocado pie in the refrigerator) and went down to the beach, ever-thankful for a beautiful day on the island.

Jessica Dofflemyer ~ all rights reserved

Commentary on the menace of beach trash, aside, it was fun to watch this boy moving his new-found treasure. A huge plastic buoy had washed toward the river mouth. Full of water, it was very heavy, but he refused to give up, dragging it to the other end of the beach with slow and steady determination.

These shots are of him – Sisyphus in motion – and then, just resting with his find.

Jessica Dofflemyer ~ all rights reserved

The other two pictures are random photos taken while Jeb and the Bohemian explored Jeb’s secret beach hideout. No mom’s allowed. Which, suited me just fine. No need to be in the boy’s club when I can draw mandalas in the sand, dip my toes in the river and sing to myself in the wind.

Jessica Dofflemyer ~ all rights reserved

I could expound upon these moments, metaphors aplenty.  Embracing shadows, treasure or trash…Could Sisyphus simply have enjoyed the uphill journey if he only had enough presence?

But it’s a holiday.  I’ll rest my mind.  Just let myself feel grateful in this thanks living.

Jessica Dofflemyer ~ all rights reserved