Weightless

In winter
the sun still rises at seven
so you slip out the front door
lace your shoes
and take a helping
of a sliver slice of sky
gold and orange
beam
through morning clouds
as hopping birds
in breast-high grasses
try their best
to remind you

leave the lists behind
just for these
here
footfalls
forget about
replies
returns
and calculations
being taxed
and the definition
of a standard deduction

never mind
that your ten-year old
has a low-grade fever
within the degrees
that will wrinkle schedules
but only serious enough
to make him grumpy

all around you
dew reflects the spectrum
boughs
lilt in light
you know
it is all
sacred
then glance
at the time
you are walking with the clock today
trying to find the way
to remember
the bigger
in all these
mundane
details

at the
lookout
you see them
three
at sea
where they
breach
breathe
birth
and breed

be

blowholes indicate
their presence
then little hints
sparkling black
glints
of fins
or a back
wet in sunlight
fresh to air

these whales
they
live
suspended
oh so heavy
yet floating
free
of gravity

they carry
a tonnage
of non-issue
spend all day
in lumbering grace
living
in liquid
exhaling

every
so often
breaking
through
the surface

photo courtesy of Luis Alejandro Bernal Romero
photo courtesy of Luis Alejandro Bernal Romero

Stepping Stones

2014-01-16_stepping stones

Sometimes I wonder where each step is leading.

The breaths, the moments, the days. Where are they taking me?

And am following this path most truly?

Can we ever really know where we are heading? And even if we could, would we understand once we had ‘gotten there’?

Art. Parenthood. Love and friendship. This life.

I sense it’s more a process. A walk without a tour guide.

No GPS, just an inner compass. And once in a while, we may get some stepping-stones along the way.

2014-01-16_stepping stone2

Tuning to Here

Ben Harper asks me to sit beside him onstage at an outdoor concert. I hold the guitar on my lap while he’s got the neck, tuning and plucking strings like a master.

He tells the audience that the first time he met me was at one of his shows, where I was backstage and he was just arriving.

He explains that he was a bit late, I had noticed the time, and my first words to him upon meeting were, “You’re not here yet.”

He laughs in his recounting, keeps sounding stings while looking at me, and says, “So I thought to myself, ‘well, then, I want to get here.'”

Morphing, as dreams do, into mirage-like segues that fade one into the next, Ben Harper leaves the stage into the crowd and I’m left to sit with his guitar.

And then, my husband appears offering a bouquet of flowers. Gifting them for “Jessica” not for “my wife.” Which is somehow understood by both of us that sometimes the title matters. Newlyweds may enjoy trying new ones on, but it’s important to remember the first name of your spouse.

As if on cue, just this rousing side of dreamland, my son garbles “Jessica” (not “Mom”) in a sleepy call from his bedroom.

In the waking world I may be an artist still tuning the instrument, looking toward the masters of the craft.

I am a wife. A mother. Both of these, still learning.

And time, it’s an illusion, fooling, but ever-present.

Jessica is still not fully here yet. But trying to tune in.

photo courtesy of Evan Mitchell
photo courtesy of Evan Mitchell